I don’t need to pretend

I am happy. We are happy. Nobody’s life is perfect, we all have room for improvement, but ultimately we, I, am happy.

I’ll admit I don’t share the niggles life brings us on social media and that I’m more than eager to share all the good parts in my life, but this does not mean I’m pretending to be happy.

There are things that I’d like to happen, things that could be better, things that could be changed but this does not mean I’m not happy.

My husband and I have been together for almost 9 years. During those 9 years I can probably count on one hand the amount of times we have “argued”. We rarely fall out. We make each other laugh. We could not be without each other. We can’t imagine life not together. We have no regrets. We don’t need to pretend, we do have a happy marriage.

Together we have 2 daughters. 2 beautiful, healthy, clever, intuitive, crazy little girls. Growing up it was my dream to have a daughter. I’d convinced myself that because I wanted a girl I would have boys so when our first daughter was born I was over the moon. My longed for baby girl. I won’t lie, my second baby I did hope that we’d have a boy, but I wouldn’t change having 2 girls for the world. Our girls have the sister I’d always wanted. A best friend for life. I don’t pretend to be happy with our 2 girls, I’m over the moon with our TWO amazing children.

There is someone missing from our life, someone very important, someone loved by us very much, but our sadness on this aspect in our life does not mean we are pretending to be happy overall.

I don’t need to pretend to be happy. I AM happy.

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